Best Cleveland Browns Tweets

In a shocking move (well kind-of but not really) the Cleveland Browns traded away their best player, 3rd round pick Trent Richardson, to the Colts, signaling they are already giving up on this season after an 0-2. Fans took to Twitter to vent their frustrations with the #factoryofsadness and below are my favorite funny Tweets about the Browns.

• @ESPN_Colin: The Browns offense, and this was inconceivable a day ago, just got less interesting.
• @_Happy_Gilmore: Cleveland Browns fall for the old "Trade us your best player and we'll give you the winning Powerball numbers" trick.
• @Kris10Guy: Being a Browns fan is like sticking your hand in a blender & hoping for the best when you already know the outcome
• @ShooterMcGavin: BREAKING: The remainder of Cleveland Browns games will be aired on Comedy Central
• @SportsNation: "HEY! We're still better than the Jaguars, you guys" - Browns management
• @TheFakeESPN: Willis McGahee hears Browns interested, calls Saul Goodman from Breaking Bad to see if he knows a guy that can help him disappear.
• @dmansworld474: Your move, Jacksonville. #browns #jags
• @HubbuchNYP: Great news, Browns fans! You’re going to have a lot of high picks in a deep draft. Horrible news, Browns fans! Mike Lombardi is picking.
• @TBone971: Guys who are still Browns: Oneil Cousins, Buster Skrine, Greg Little. Guys who aren't #Browns : Trent Richardson.
• @TheFakeESPN: Browns trade Trent Richardson to Colts, marking the biggest release from captivity in Cleveland since Amanda Berry.
• ‏@FunSkipBayless BREAKING: Trent Richardson just broke his own 40yrd dash record and all of Usain Bolt's world records, when he ran out of Browns facilities.
• @datageneral: The @Browns had to trade Trent Richardson because he didn't fit into their system of being terrible at football.
  @HJonesin: The browns just traded Joe Haden for a plate of nachos and a 2007 #witness tee shirt
  

  @Cole4X_mas21 Cleveland browns even clearing cap room to get Lebron in 2014!

  Download a 2013 NFL Helmet schedule spreadsheet

Downloadable 2013 NIT Tournament Bracket

If you can’t get enough basketball, in addition to the 2013 March Madness Brackets I’ve also made a 2013 NIT bracket for free download. There is no Pool manager for the National Invitation Tournament (have you ever heard of anyone running an NIT office pool?) but if your favorite team was left out of the field of 68 and sent to the NIT you can use the bracket as a schedule for the NIT Tournament. I’ve included the dates, times, and TV coverage for each game.

Go to my Excel Spreadsheets Help blog to download the 2013 NIT Bracket! Instructions are included within the spreadsheet.

2013 March Madness Bracket Download

Get your 2013 March Madness Brackets! It's time to try and predict the winners and losers, who will get upset and who will win it all?

Go to my Excel Spreadsheets Help blog to download the 2013 March Madness bracket. Instructions are included within the spreadsheet.

Join my pool in Yahoo's Tourney Pick'em here.

Rob Ryan versus Willy Wonka

While watching Monday Night Football we noticed a startling similarity between the Dallas Cowboys' defensive coordinator Rob Ryan (brother of Jets head coach Rex Ryan) and one of my favorite childhood films. It's the hair.

Don’t Put Me In Coach Book Review

I just finished “Don’t Put Me In, Coach: My Incredible NCAA Journey from the end of the bench to the end of the bench” by Ohio State walk on Mark Titus. Mark was a bench warmer on the Ohio State basketball team from 2006 to 2010. His Club Trillion blog launched him into the media spotlight and his career took off from there. The book is a funny journey into the locker room of the Buckeye basketball team. You will learn things you never knew about some of the most famous Ohio State basketball players of all time. I’ll never look at college basketball coach Thad Matta the same way ever again (the part where Mark describes the first time he met Thad is unforgettable). Get the inside scoop on the personality of players like Greg Oden and Evan “the Villain” Turner. Find out what really goes on in practice and overnight away game trips. 


The book, while a fun and easy read, is far from perfect. The beginning was laugh out loud funny and quite refreshing. However, the same style of humor and very similar jokes throughout make it increasingly not as funny the further you read into it. Also, a majority of the jokes are bathroom style humor, so if that’s not your thing then I recommend not reading. It’s very hard to tell what is true and what was fabricated for entertainment purposes. You find out how to earn a trillion in basketball stats but I found that segment of the book rather uninspiring (but maybe you other walk ons and benchwarmers will find it inspirational).


Regardless, if you’re a fan of OSU basketball I highly recommend you read  “Don’t Put me in, Coach.” The insight into how past Buckeye team’s chemistry was is something all hardcore fans crave and on that front Mark delivers in delicious doses.


Embedded below is a video Mark “The shark” (yes, that is the nickname he gave himself) Titus created and uploaded to YouTube. As he likes to say, he is “making it rain.” If you do decide to read you should watch Mark’s YouTube videos because he does refer to them in the book.

Best Bobby Petrino Tweets

I think this Bobby Petrino crash turned affair story is just too ridiculousness and perfectly fitting that it happened to an SEC team. And the story just keeps getting better and better and the Tweets and comments keep getting cruder and cruder. 


Quick run down: coach crashes motorcycle, lies to superiors about it, police report with true facts come out revealing 25 year old female also on bike, female turns out to have been hired by coach a week earlier (100k gig, wonder what the interview was like?), female discovered to be engaged to another coach. Coach Petrino admits to having a "previous affair" previous as in right up to the crash. Coach placed on leave, now police officer in question due to relationship to football team. 


Here are some of the best tweets about this crazy story:

• Bobby Petrino cheats on his wife, gets suspended. Rick Pitino cheats on his wife, gets a raise. Shoulda stayed in Louisville, Bobby.
• Razorbacks suspend Bobby Petrino after finding out he had a piglet on board his hog.
• People in Arkansas seem shocked as they watch the Bobby Petrinoscandal unfold on TV. I'm shocked too - that people in Arkansas have TVs.
• More is being learned about the 25 year old with Bobby Petrino. She could have gone 1st class, but for some reason preferred to ride Coach.
• Petrino can't play defense but he can definitely score!!
• So I take it Patrino hired her for her experience and intelligence. Did anyone else 'interview' for the job?
• She's a volleyball player - must have taken her knee pads to the interview.
• "The wife will get half his stuff, so I think she should coach half the games."
• My family? My dick? My employer? My dick? Aw, who am I kidding here? I'm gonna go with my dick on this one.
• I just can't believe petrino would lie or cover something up. This is unprecedented.
• viagra warns against operating motor vehicles under the its influence
• What I learned from Tiger Woods and Bobby Petrino: if you cheat on your wife, don't have a vehicular accident
• So was it the wreck or his wife that made him look like that?
• If Petrino is fired, hope Arkansas' AD leaves the explanation in a note on a locker room chair        @Brian McIntyre
• I'm suprised, they being from Arkansas, that the two weren't related. She must not be good enough for her own family!
• Pitino...Paterno...and now Petrino... coaches involved in scandals. Any coincidence?
• Arkansas has a football team?

Best March Madness Tweets (3/15/2012)

I haven't done one of these in awhile so this is long overdue! It's time for the best March Madness tweets! The NCAA men's basketball tournament is one of the best time's of the year. Social media and tweeter have only enhanced the event by connecting us to other fans and viewers from around the world. Here are some of the best, most creative, and funny tweets and comments about March Madness on Twitter. You'll notice some popular topics and themes including: productivity in America, VCU, Baylor's uniforms, candidates for the presidency, states that aren't states, and, yes, the Kardashians:

• Interesting strategy by Baylor to dress as Teletubbies for#marchmadness 
• If the #Baylor men don't win their #NCAA game tonight they can help elementary school kids cross the street in the morning 
• TNT's decision to put NBA analysts on makes local radio broadcasts even more valuable. They actually know the teams. #marchmadness 
• No detail left undiscovered. Shaka Smart wore very same tie in first round game last year. 
• VCU head coach Shaka Smart is like the groundhog; we see him once a year, he makes national news, then forget about him for 11 months. 
• My #Illini source says Shaka Smart is "Option #1, 2, 3, 4 and 5," whatever that may mean. 
• #Baylor wants to be like Oregon so bad they are practically quacking on the court... #marchmadness 
• Sorry America is closed today. I'm watching #MarchMadness (from Barack Obama)
• Mitt Romney: "There's a state in America called Murray? The Jews really ARE taking over." #MarchMadness 
• Evidently Mitt Romney tried to fill out an NCAA bracket but he couldn't finish it. He kept flip flopping between every choice. 
• The Kardashian family will be scouting the NCAA Tournament for future black men to steal from. 
• Ya Murray State. Always believed in ya. I have no idea who plays for you, who is murray, and what state you're in. #marchmadness 
• Hear that sound? That was America's productivity completing nose-diving for the next 24+ work hours... #marchmadness 

Follow me on Twitter. Download your March Madness bracket.

2012 NCAA Tournament Bracket Download

Click here to learn how to dominate your March Madness bracket pool!

March Madness has finally arrived which means it's time to fill out your tournament bracket!
Visit my Excel Spreadsheets Help blog to learn how to complete your NCAA tournament bracket Excel file. Below I've provided the download links for the Excel bracket and office pool manager. Or you can print the bracket above and fill it out by hand.

2012 NCAA Tournament Bracket spreadsheet.xls download
2012 NCAA Tournament Bracket Pool Manager spreadsheet.xls download

Comment below if you wish to join my pool!

Best Superbowl, Puppy Bowl and Commercial Tweets

It's Super Sunday! Our last best football tweets until September sadly. I'm going to break this up into three sections, the best Super Bowl tweets, the best Super Bowl commercial tweets, and (for you ladies) the bes Puppy Bowl Tweets!

Best Superbowl Tweets

• Lucas Stadium represents "tails" because the Colts played like ass this year.
• Eli's doing well, but still hasn't scored as many points for the Giants as Brady. #SuperBowl
• Sometimes I have to use oxygen after I do something at my job, too. #SuperBowl
• Tom Brady's hail Mary was intercepted because he's not Tim Tebow. #SuperBowl

Best Superbowl commercial Tweets:

• This Pepsi commercial is almost as bad as that Tom Brady pass.
• Hyundai had a ton of extras in that commercial. I wonder if they got them from an unemployment line at a plant closing.
• 20 mins in and ZERO talking animal commercials?? WTF?? #superbowl
• Hey can you back up the DVR for that commercial? I missed the unnecessary long hashtag I'll never use to say I watched it. #superbowl
• These Superbowl commercials are playing like The Patriots. #SuperBowl
• Watching these #Coke commercials and realizing, sadly, that this is the closest the Bears are getting to the #SuperBowl
• These commercials are all lacking some Ryan Gosling. #justsaying #SuperBowl
• "Life is packed with things you gotta do. Like sometimes you gotta do #SuperBowl commercials purely for money." - Matthew Broderick

Best Puppy Bowl Tweets:

• My dog is home by herself, so my wife left the Puppy Bowl on for her. Seriously, that is what's happening in my home right now.
• I hope the puppies get big fat bonuses too. #puppybowl
• Confident it's spelled "ruffing" in the #PuppyBowl script.
• It's too bad that the MVP (Most Valuable Pup) of the puppy bowl can't be in tomorrows parade at Magic Kingdom. #PuppyBowl
• Puppy Bowl is all fun and games until someone gets drafted by Michael Vick. #puppybowl
• These are some really talented puppies this year. Not one of them has pooped on the field. #PuppyBowl